my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
