Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
