For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
This baby is an asshole
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Randomize
