Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
His hands were made for my vagina.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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