He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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