Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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