is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
