I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
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