The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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