you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
