I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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