Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I just gargled with NyQuil
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
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