Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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