WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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