its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
