i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
