She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
