You know, be my cock's hype man.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
