His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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