WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
vagina is talking i cant
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize
