So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
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