you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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