Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
