i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
did you just send me my own nude
COCAINE IS GR8
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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