worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
