why didn't you poke me back
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
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