PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
