porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
