Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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