I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
