drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
