What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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