Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
