Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
