Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize