Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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