yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
