so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
