She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
