apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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