it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
