Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
