At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
she looked like the before picture.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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