Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
