She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
