she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
