Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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