Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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