I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize
