I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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