i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize